It is always busy here in the black hole.
Tuxedo Boy can be spotted in trees, walking tight wires and hunched under vehicles, ready to pounce.
The other evening Bark Man ran for miles and miles. He was amazing. I mean at his age not many could do it. From what my sweet Sven and I could gather, he was after a real bad dude. We could tell by all his growling and wiggling around that it was serious. I had to push the coffee table away so he wouldn't kick it and wake himself up. That would have been a crime, as it was during his prime barking hours.
Cat Lady was busy guarding all of us from her favorite look out on the landing. From her perch she is not only able to nod off while on duty, she has a clear view of both the living room and the kitchen.
It is important for her to always keep one eye, opened or closed, on the kitchen door.
You see, her little punk of a brother, Tuxedo Boy, scales the thing when he is ready to come inside to, A) have a snack, and, B) Kill Cat Lady.
Not all caped crusaders get along.
That is just a fairy tale.
In reality, crime fighting heroes are thin skinned creatures with huge egos.
"Look at me!" they meow from tree tops.
"Look at me!" they bark from floors.
"Look at me!" they shriek from landings.
My sweet Sven and I used to be young. And we have pictures to prove it.
But.
Well, the titanic trio has been trying to sink our ship for a while now.
And.
While I know how important they are.
And while I understand this world needs super heroes more than ever before.
I sometimes lose my perspective.
Every now and then I think that maybe it is all in their heads.
Maybe they are not saving anybody from anything.
Maybe they are a just bunch of ass holes.
But, whenever this crazy thought crosses my mind, I snap right out of it.
Hang on a second.
Bark Man is calling me.
"What now?"
Oh.
With a little help from his new sling and me, he is able to get up in order to wander into another room, in order to find another spot, so that he can circle around, lay down, and get stuck there.
"I am coming Bark Man!"
There.
He is all set.
Apparently he is planning to guard the hallway for a bit.
"What?"
It sounds like Cat Lady is lost again. For someone who cannot hear, she can sure make a lot of noise.
There.
She was just a little turned around in my closet.
Now, where was I?
Well never mind.
It doesn't matter where I was.
Tuxedo Boy wants in.
It is time for the little old lady in glitter and pearls to be hauled back down to her fancy apartment for a nap.
I am considering having an elevator installed.
Bat Man has one.
It sure would be nice to just push a button and watch those doors close.
And.
"Sven, are elevators expensive?"
Maybe an elevator would keep this old ship afloat a little longer.
"Sven?"
Now, where did he disappear to?
For more stories in this crime fighting series, click above on Titanic Trio.