Featuring Le Mere: Le hostess avec le mostess
OFFICIALE BS BUSINESS
"What? Non officiale business? C'est domage. Okay then ce Bar es open. "
BS CONVERSATIONNES
Ma Soeur: Porquoi es vous pouring deux Jagermeisters?
Moi: Ce I pour, she will comez.
Le door openezed et en walked Giselle.
Moi: See, I told vous.
Ma Mere: I heard from Ki-Ki le last soir.
Ma Soeur: How es she doing? Es she staying warm?
Ma Mere: Votre poor soeur, She was stuckezed en la traffic due to le snow de la storm. They don't know what por to do when it snows en Georgia. Le mayor sent all de les peoples home après it was too late. It took her cinq heurs to travel just sept miles.
Le Club: NON!
Giselle: On le televisionne it lookezed like all de la lanes were at une stand de la still on une side de la rue, mais all de la lanes were empty on le other side de la rue. I would have gonezed over to le other side de la rue et drivezed back.
Moi: Vous can't just drivez en any directionne on les rues, Giselle. Vous have to drivez en le correctemente directionne.
Giselle: What? That es not what I meantezed. I meantezed that I would go on le other side mais I would drivez en le correctemente directionne.
Moi: Vous do understandez that if vous drivez en le opposite directionne de votre mason, vous will never get to votre mason, right?
Giselle: OH, vous es impossible Millie. Of course I know that. Mais vous could drivez until vous foundez une route de une alternative por to take.
Ma Mere: I remembre when I was jeune et we livezed en DC de la Washington et there was une grand snow de la storm. They let us out du work early, just après noon. I was tres excitemente por to get home et por to make une nice dinner por votre pere. Mais alas, I was stuckezed riding around et around en le bus until le P.M. de Sept!
Ma Soeur: Did vous hearez about les peoples who foundez une kitten en le snow that was frozee?
Le Club: Non.
Ma Soeur: Oui, he was frozee, mais they savezed him.
Moi: Did they thawez him out avec une dryer de les hairs?
Le Club: Hahahahaha
Giselle: That remindez moi du mon cousin that es crazy. Apres he lost his mere he was found wanderezing around le mason wearing her clothes.
Ma Mere: What does that havez to do avec une kitten that was frozee et thawezed out?
Giselle: Oh, he foundezed une raccoon that was frozee et he brought him enside du le mason et he put him on top du la heater d'electrique.
Moi: Did that workez?
Giselle: Non, it fryezed le raccoon et almost burnezed down le mason.
Ma Mere: He does sound crazy.
Giselle: Mon husband broke out avec les hives just parlezing avec him at une reunion de la famille. Mon cousin told Michele that he was applying por une job de la superentendante de l'ecole parce que he wanted une job that he could dormez en. Et, he had more than Sept hundred dollares de le fines por drivezing through le lane de le Pass de le I, mais he didn't havez une I-Pass.
Le Club: Hahahahaha
Ma Soeur: OMD. I was avec Millie une time when she drovez through le lane du le Pass de le I, en accidente. It was pourezing down les rains et I said, "Millie, vous es en le wrong lane! Movez over."
Moi: Mais, I could not movez over. It was too hard por to see, et I wentez right through Le Pass de le I, lane. If they would have snapezed une photgraphe por to send moi une ticekt, we would have lookezed just like this.
Ma Mere: Giselle, j'aime votre shirt. It es tres jolie.
Giselle: Merci. Le other jour I tookezed une shower et Michelle said, "Where es vous going?" Et I said, "Nowhere. Je stinkez. Some de les times peoples just take les showers."
Le Club: Hahahahaha
Clementine: Did vous know that le Spring es just 50 jours away?
Le Club: Yay! That es excellente news.
Ma Mere: Spring es just une date. Le weather needs por to changez. It needs to changez une lot.
Clementine: I mailed une letter to Christophe at le boot de la camp, et I signezed it, Mademoiselle Clementine.
Louisa: Vous es une bon amie Clementine. He will be tres surprizezed et happy por to receivez ce lettre.
Clementine: Por le ceremnony de la matrimony du ma fille le next year, she es planning por to have le Jewish dance de la Chair. Won't that be cool?
Moi: Es her fiancé Jewish?
Clementine: Non. They es not religious, mais they both likez le Jewish dance de la chair.
Moi: Es they going por to play Hava Nagila at le reception et do ce dancez where all de les peoples es squatted down like this, et have les arms foldez across les chests like this, et they kickez up all de les feetes like this? I sangez le song et demonstrated le dance to le best du mes abilities.
Clementine: I hope so. J'adore le song when it es sangez correctemente. I have been tryezing to get ma fille por to let mon amie Aimee singez just une song at le ceremony.
Ma Soeur: At our ceremony de la matrimony our song was, 'Risez de la Soliel, Setez de la soleil.'
Clementine: OMD!! I must havez Aimee singez ce song. J'adorez ce song. I must parlez ma fille into this. She toldez moi, "Ma mere, there will be no songez por Aimee to singez at le ceremony. It es already going por to be forty de les minutes long."
Louisa: Back en le jour when I was en ecole du high we went on une trip de field to Arizona por le classe du Biology. Mon amie was always baking et baking. She made une batch de les brownies por to bring et she stuffezed them avec le pot. Mais, she should have taken out some de les sticks et les stems. They did not tastez le best.
Ma Mere: What did she stuffez them avec?
Louisa: Pot.
Ma Mere: Et this was por l'ecole?
Giselle: Guess what vous guys? Le Beaste du Rue de Bray has been spottezed en Burlington! Isn't that excitement?
Moi: What es Le Beaste du Rue du Bray?
Giselle: It es une beastly creature that es une cross betweenez une grand, grand bear et Le Foote that es Grand.
Clementine: Oh, let's go there por to see if we can see le Beaste. J'adore les beastes.
Giselle: Oh, moi too!
Clementine: I went to see le luminere that es Paulding en Michigan on several de les occasionnes.
Ma Mere: What es that?
Clementine: It es un lumninere. En les soirs it swingez back et forth et back et forth et they cannot explainez it. It es en un spot that used por to be une station de le rue de la rail et le story goes that it es le luminere du une worker de le rue de la rail that was killezed. They say that he es still out there en les soirs swingezing le luminere por all de les trains that don't passez through there anymore.
Ma Mere: Es vous believez that? How many de les times havez vous been there?
Clementine: Je pense about huit de les times.
Ma Mere: Et out du huit de les times how many times did vous see le luminere?
Clementine: About half de les times. Une time it was tres, tres frightenemente, parce que when we were ready por to leavez ma automobile wouldn't startez.
Le Club: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Clementine: I know! It was just like en les movies that es scary.
Ma Mere: Were there lots de les pot being smokezed enside votre vehicle?
Le Club: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Et then it was time por Le Shake Du Jour
Bartender du jour: Ma Mere
Numbre du jour: Trois
Rules: Une dollar to play, cinq of a kind to win half de le pot, trois shakes et farming de la land is allowed.
1st Shaker: Ma Mere……………resulte…………Trois.
2nd Shaker: Clementine…………resulte…….Quatre!!!
3rd Shaker: Ma Soeur………..resulte……..Deux.
4th Shaker: Moi………..resulte……..Deux.
5th Shaker: Giselle………..resulte……..Une.
Once again all de les monies es safe et soundez enside le cup du le Rouge Solo.
Come back por to see us ce next week. Vous will not be able por to take all de le suspense of what vous might missez if vous don't.
